Feeling a bit down on myself...

Well, today was one of those days, where I felt like I was just here. I had no motivation to do anything, although, I still had to.

Recently, I was asked to serve on a ministy committee at our church, which I am very honored to have been asked. Well, I received an email wondering where I would like to be "plugged in" at. I decided what I would do, was email this person back, and give my strengths and weaknesses and according to those, be placed where I am needed or where I would fit in. In deciding to write this email, I called 2 people, I will not mention their names, nor their relationship to me. I am not mad at these people, I hold no grudges for what was or was not said. I just felt down. I asked both people "What do you think my strengths are?" The first response, from both parties was silence...like a minute of silence. The first person then replied, "Well, I guess your strength could be that you are good with kids."

SLAP!

Obviously I know this about myself already because, HELLO!!! I have 3 kids. I was looking more along the lines of skills that I am good at, organized, not organized, creative, not creative...etc.. And then I heard "Well, I'll have to think about it and call you back." Next call, "What do you think my strengths are?" Reply:"..............." Silence. This one was more of a slap in the face than the other one. Here I am thinking, "Ok, apparently, I am not good at anything, I have no strengths..." Then I hear, "Well, I guess you are good with kids since you have 3 of them."

SLAPSLAPSLAPSLAP!!!!

Now, I am thinking, "Ok, I am only good at taking care of kids. Apparently I should just become a professional baby maker because apparently that is all I am good at." Well, I ended that conversation. Once again, I am not mad at these people. I guess I just need to do some re-evaluating of my life, because apparently I have no strengths whatsoever. I guess I am just destined to make babies, have them, and care for them. How will I ever be able to go back to work if all I can list on skills is "I am good with kids." Ridiculous. Of course I am going to be down on myself. What a way to spend a day. Not only am I taking care of my 3 kids this day, cleaning the house, feeding mouths, and doing laundry, but I am also having to re-evaluate my life...

Great. What a day.

How will I end my day?

Baths for 3 kids, husband still not home, night clothes for kids, kids in bed, clean what is strewn all over the living room, and realize : right now, it is 7:23, and I have yet to eat a meal.

What a day.

It's off to the bath for the kids. Then I suppose I can get in bed, just to lay and think.

By the way, I emailed this person back and told her what areas I would like to help in and what areas I would not like to help in. I guess I could have avoided the whole situation by doing this first and not calling anyone and asking them anything.

Chalk one up for me on making myself feel down.